Monday, July 18, 2011

You think you know....

Raise your hand if anyone has ever said to you, "hot yoga/ regular yoga/ultra running/running is dangerous/bad for you!"

I swear. Who are these people? Why do they think they know anything about anything? Mostly I think they are just jealous of my cute running skirts and my fashionable yoga booty shorts, but other times, I wonder if they are just dumb. Tell me, what "exercise" could be more natural (obviously natural is a LOADED term, but just go with it here) than running or yoga?

The only other sport(s) that fall in this category would be swimming (but you have to eliminate the chlorine pools because let's face it, no one is meant to smell like that. people are, however, meant to wear spandex. fact. it's in the bible.) or gymnastics (but again, this is limited to the floor exercises and only floor exercises on a grassy field because real life doesn't have a trampoline floor) and dancing. by God, there will be dancing.

Football? Hell no.
Basketball? (as much as i LOVE it- no. mostly because you can get smacked in the face with a basketball. we all know that does not qualify as something your body was born to do.)
(** currently withholding many inappropriate jokes**)
Shotput? Polo? Tennis? Soccer? Rowing? (i know from personal experience that rowing is for prisoners and anyone who deserves torture)
Wrestling? (no again- ring worm. and violence.)

It's not that these sports are bad in anyway. or un fun. or un human. It's just that you can't wake up in the morning and say, "hmmmmm, lemme use my body and go do this stuff." I could run naked if i needed to. I could do yoga naked if I wanted to -- (side note- there are naked yoga classes. deep question of the day- would you want to be in the front of the class or the back of the class? think about it). Other sports require lots of stuff. It's not that "stuff" makes a sport bad, it's just that I don't understand how "exercise" that requires only the body is dangerous or bad for you. I will ALWAYS hold the opinion that any exercise can be bad for you if you are stupid about it.

Harry Potter Comparison- Skip this if you don't understand.
WHen i am running or doing yoga, I feel like I am in Book 4 in the graveyard of Little Hangleton when Voldy and Harry's wands connect and they have this electric current running between and around them. Except that I feel as if I am connecting to all the worlds before me, all the people right now, and all the humans to come. These are two instinctual activities- connections to past, present, and future. Kinda like old stones steps that have been worn down by centuries of feetsies.


I don't understand why people think that something so basic as running or something so fluid as yoga would be bad for you. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that you are more likely to come away damaged from years of football (brain damage) or tennis (my mom has no cartilage left in her knees and my brother has had 2 knee surgeries). If i have children, not only are they wearing ear plugs everyday of their life, but they are also forbidden to play contact sports. Running only. I'm gonna be that mom who says, here son/daughter/perhaps ungendered child-- put on your vibrams and go run up that mountain in our backyard with your Auntie Sabrina and then let's dance around in our underwear for a while and THEN we can do yoga before bed to calm down and make sure you can touch your toes when you are 60 years old.

I will be the best mom ever.

And the rest of the world- the people who sit on their bumbum all day long telling other people that yoga and running are bad/dangerous for you- will NOT be the best mom ever.

The end. Stepping off my soapbox. and giving you a puppy picture to make things happy.
Ultra Love.


  1. Hahahaha! I love the folks who ask how my knees are holding up or tell me the heat is too dangerous or offer up anecdotal horror stories. I usually come back with a story about some poor soul who came to an untimely end crossing the street to grab a burger or in a 10 car pileup ...
    From a Reason Magazine piece: "For example, in 2003 about 45,000 Americans died in motor accidents out of population of 291,000,000. So, according to the National Safety Council this means your one-year odds of dying in a car accident is about one out of 6500. Therefore your lifetime probability (6500 ÷ 78 years life expectancy) of dying in a motor accident are about one in 83."

  2. i LOVE this! hahah. I've not heard it about yoga before, but I have about running (running 10 miles must be really bad for your knees, I'd like to see how well you're walking in your 70s) uh. what?