Never let anyone tell you how to....

Drive.

A week and a half ago I had a car accident. I was driving down a major street- 2 lanes both ways and a 3rd right turning lane going my direction. Traffic was heavy, and the two main traffic lanes were back up about 3 blocks. The right turn lane, however, was wide open. Since I was about to turn right at the upcoming intersection, I got into that right lane.

And then I hit them.

The people in the lanes next to me had waved a left-turning car on through so they could turn into the white castle. The car that was turning left didn't even see me coming- perhaps didn't even look.

At impact, my side airbags deployed. Either the airbags or the shock of the accident caused me to lose my hearing for minute. I just sat in the car- my ipod still playing the Lord of the Rings. Once I came back to my surroundings, I got out of the car to see if the two people in the other car were okay. But at that moment, 4 men in the Army came running across the busy street to help. One gentleman walked me out of the street and the other 3 checked on those two people.

At this point, I still can't ear out of my left ear. I am also shaking and crying. The nice man asks me if I have  phone/my insurance etc. I tell him it is all in my purse in my car (thank goodness I was not texting or even looking at my phone). He graciously goes to grab my things, and hands me my phone. The phone is my new iPhone 5- which I had activated 20 minutes before and had no idea how to work. Through my tears I manage to tell the man that I don't know how to use my phone and he calls my boyfriend for me. Unfortunately, my boo was in the studio with his phone off. Thankfully, my boss had texted me minutes before and thus, her number was in my phone.

She came to pick me up. By that time I had spoken to my dad and he told me to go to the emergency room to have my hearing checked out. My sweet wonderful boss took me there, and stayed with my until my boyfriend picked me up after I got checked out. I have an appointment at a hearing clinic tomorrow.

The people I hit:
1. had no insurance
2. had a suspended driver's license
3. did not own the car they were driving
4. were most likely not wearing seat belts
5. had to be cut out of their car
6. went straight to the hospital in the ambulance

I have no idea what happened to them. But I do know what is going on with me. I am jittery driving in the car and hyper-aware of everything. I have had my neck adjusted twice, and I got great relief from going to yoga the day after the accident. My soreness went from 100% to about 10%. But I also struggle with how to feel. I feel bad that I hit these people. Yes, it was 100% their fault in many different ways. The accident should have never happened because they should never have been driving in the first place. But I have changed their lives in a HUGE way. The driver might go to jail, and I am certain that their injuries were worse than mine. I know that I am not supposed to feel bad about this, but I do. And i suspect that I will feel bad for a while, much like I will be jumpy in the car for a while.

At the end of the day, I think that I just will plan on not ever having a car accident again. Can I get an amen?

Ultra love,

Elise